User blog:RA2/Ragnabot

Since my idea for this didn't go over so well, I figured, why not just do it myself? I have the drive and determination. So I threw together a list of every robot ever from Robot Wars, then whittled it down to the ones I'd actually witnessed doing battle. The number that that came out to was 525. Which works out nicely because that's only away from a square number, 512. To square the numbers, 26 robots have been randomly selected to fight a preliminary match. The 13 survivors get shuffled in to the main tournament. No rhyme or reason to the ordering, and no adjustments for better matches. If Razer fights Pussycat in the first round, then so be it. Don't take this too seriously; I didn't, you'll notice I didn't bother coming up with which house robots were in the arena unless I needed to. Anyways, enjoy.

Metalis vs Piecemaker
The minuscule Piecemaker had the speed advantage, and used it to broadside into Metalis. However ,its underwheling weapon power kept it from doing much damage, apart from scratching the lustrous silver paint. Metalis eventually turned and slipped Piecemaker in between its claw and plough. The lifter creaked open and tipped Picemaker onto its side. "Hit me again" cried the Piecemaker team, but their pleas fell on deaf ears as Refbot counted their robot out. Dead Metal came in as if to say "that's not a saw, THIS is a saw." Piecemaker's disc bent and flexed as Dead Metal pressed down on it. The assault had righted Piecemaker, but it was out.

Winner: Metalis

Terror Turtle vs Vector
Terror Turtle charged in fast, a little too fast, and found itself on top of Vector's wedge. Vector fired its flipper/lifter and topple the Turtle sideways, its wide wheelbase just barely keeping it right side up. Terror Turtle retreated, charged in again, this time glancing off of Vector's wedge. Vector's turning had become a bit sluggish, giving Terror Turtle a chance to gash its rear armour. Vector fired its lifter and a puff of CO2 spilled out from the back and it became clear that its pneumatcs had sprung a leak. Terror turtle continued scratching until time ran out and it went to the judges

Winner: Terror Turtle

Cassius 2 vs Dome
This one was over in a trice, Cassius slipped under the Dome and flipped it on its back with one try. Presently, the house robots in the arena were Sir Killalot and Mr. Psycho, so Cassius wisely decided to stand down from trying to flip them.

Winner: Cassius 2

Centurion vs Scorpion
Centurion got the first attack, flicking Scorpion up but not over. As Scorpion fell, its disc took a piece out of Centurion's "eyes". Ceturion turned and fired its axe, putting a hole in Scorpion's top. But with its flat front exposed, Centurion received a huge gash in the front. Up in the booth Ray was hammering down on the axe trigger, but the axe would not fire. Scorpion took another bite of Centurion, this time cutting into the side. The metal bent back and jammed into Centurion's tyre, pinning the wheel in place. As Centurion could onyl move in circles, the Refbot counted it out. Growler took it to the Drop Zone, and the big silver box's doors flew open, pummeling Centurion with bright red bowling balls.

Cygnus X1 vs Destructive Criticism
Destructive Criticism gunned its NPC motors and sliced into Cygnus' side. The rather plain robot flipped DC over, but DC was unfazed and continued to scratch away. Cygnus got in again, and slowly raised its flipper, suspending DC on its rear. DC couldn't move, but Cygnus wasn't moving or lowering its flipper. After the 30 second deadly-embrace cutoff point, Refbot came in and gave the duo a firm shove. DC crashed to the floor and sauntered away unharmed, but Cygnus was clearly dead. Refbot counted it out, and Matild came in with her flywheel and flipped it straight over. Cassius Chrome pushed it onto the floor flipper, and made the swan fly.

Kat 3 vs Demon
Demon crawled forward, attempting to flip Kat 3, but the Kat was fast enough to get around Demon's side. It hammered into Demon's shell relentlessly, eventually puncturing the face. It had no means of shutting Demon down, but the judges' decision was no close call.

Winner: Kat 3

The Stag vs The Brute
The Brute was having some trouble getting its drum spinning, so the Stag grabbed hold of it. It attempted to pierce a hole, but couldn't get through the thick metal. Instead it just settled for ramming, it backed up and the two robots charged at each other, Brute riding up The Stag's wedge and getting some airtime. Brute slammed into Stag with its rear spike, not doing any visible damage. One of Brute's wheels was not spinning, hampering its movement. The Brute was still mobile, but going in lopsided circles. The Stag grabbed it and pushed it around with no clear destination until time ran out and it went to the judges.

Winner: The Stag

Barber-Ous 2'n a Bit vs Maximum Torque
Barberous got the first strike in almost immediately, flipping the Dutch robot over. Maximum Torque could still run inverted, and it wedged underneath Barber-ous, whose teeth got imbedded is it body. The robots spun in a circle as they jockeyed for position and eventually separated. Maximum Torque swerved and its wheel collided with Barber-ous' drum. The wheel had locked up and Maximum torque stood stock still when attempting to spin up the other one. Refbot counted it out before Mr. Psycho came in and cracked it with his hammer.

Winner: Barberous 2'n a Bit