User blog:ToastUltimatum/Completely Genuine Live Reactions/Heat B

Heat B

 * Nick: at least we'll finally get to see Kan-Opener as a seed based on last weeks preview trailer
 * Toast: hardly saw it in that opening montage like, but yeah
 * Nick: well hopefully Channel 5 are holding back on the Series 6-esque spoilers
 * Toast: yeah that's true they were probably melees
 * Toast: Extreme 2 told us Kan-Opener picks its moment
 * Nick: who are the machines in that second battle
 * Nick: and did the fourth machine already get pitted or something
 * Toast: I didn't recognise them and could only see three
 * Nick: ey there's kan-opener
 * Toast: must be flipped in a corner
 * Nick: but not with a seed
 * Nick: um
 * Toast: what seed was Kan-Opener??
 * Toast: or is it not?
 * Nick: I assume it's a stuart macdonald scripting error surely
 * Toast: they introduced it first, so it must be
 * Toast: no way is this Grim Reaper related to that other one
 * Toast: AAAAAH THE EYES
 * Nick: when will teams realise it's boring to steal names used previously...
 * Toast: We'll have to look up Simon Smith on AOL
 * Toast: Big Nipper, I remember that from the Razer DVD
 * Nick: if it can damage razer's wings then it might do well here
 * Nick: and it looks improved in general
 * Toast: poor Jayne, she's still learning
 * Nick: I'd fancy barbaric response to do well here. kan-opener might struggle to move it around properly
 * Toast: I hope they win the series because this kid knows how to spend £20k
 * Nick: I'll back kan-opener and big nipper here
 * Toast: I think Big Nipper looks solid, Barbaric Response is in off a Tag Team final
 * Toast: Kan-Opener has a decent shout but I think we might lose another seed
 * Toast: can those claws actually close?
 * Nick: Wow, the favourites are trying to take each other out
 * Nick: surely they have to unpin them
 * Toast: I can't tell if Big Nipper's jaws actually close, but they're clearly winning this with Kan-Opener right now
 * Toast: Yeah you're right actually, is Kan-Opener stuck?
 * Toast: or are they cheating like Razer?
 * Toast: OH BIG NIPPER THAT WAS CLOSE
 * Nick: I think barbaric response should protest after this. Kan-Opener is carrying out an illegal move
 * Nick: an illegal move which is giving me concussion
 * Nick: oh god this is going all the way
 * Nick: well kan-opener's attempt at cheating backfired
 * Toast: At this point Grim Reaper must have more points than Kan-Opener, but maybe the Judges will intervene in favour of Barbaric Response
 * Toast: This time Big Nipper can actually beat the seeded crusher
 * Nick: oh fuck sake why are we having an ad break
 * Nick: I mean I'm looking forward to pokemon emerald but still
 * Toast: bloody commercials! I guess it is a hard decision
 * Nick: oh my mini robots
 * Toast: I hope Flybot is back
 * Nick: now let's see what happens here
 * Nick: surely noel sharkey and co have to intervene in some form
 * Nick: wow
 * Toast: They aren't gonna mention the death grip at all?
 * Nick: the seed has actually gone
 * Toast: I guess Grim Reaper and Big Nipper deserved it, but wow, RIP seed
 * Nick: and without even a mention of the controversy
 * Toast: Did they actually call it Killerkat
 * Nick: if that was razer they would have
 * Nick: what the hell is this thing
 * Toast: Didn't we already have a Kater Killer
 * Toast: Jonathan's right, it's totally ripping off Pussycat
 * Nick: absolutely
 * Nick: eh, jackson wallop looks alright i guess
 * Toast: 88kg so I haven't got high hopes
 * Nick: 12kg of weight to spare, mind
 * Nick: now gyrobot looks a better way of doing it
 * Toast: another spinner, they're going all out for this one
 * Nick: 40kg of spinner, woof
 * Toast: This one's going through for sure
 * Toast: Not sure between Jackson and Killerkat, let's see the fourth one
 * Nick: WAIT WHAT
 * Nick: TERRORHURTZ
 * Toast: YOU WHAT
 * Nick: WHAT'S HAPPENING
 * Nick: WHAT THE HELL
 * Toast: There's John Reid!!
 * Nick: DISQUALIFIED WHAT THE HELL
 * Nick: OH MY GOD
 * Toast: So Kan-Opener wasn't seeded after all?
 * Nick: It doesn't seem like it
 * Nick: that's a farce
 * Toast: That's stunning, no wonder we couldn't find a fourth robot
 * Toast: as if they're not even replacing it, the battle's just going ahead
 * Nick: I don't give a damn about this fight now
 * Toast: Rip them both up, Gyrobot
 * Nick: How can they start the battle with these sorts of conditions
 * Nick: at least the spinners seem to deal out solid-enough hits
 * Toast: Not as good as Terrorhurtz would've given, was he legit just late to the studio? I'm suspicious
 * Nick: but man, no terrorhurtz, and it was the number 3 seed, too
 * Toast: Wait so if Terrorhurtz is seeded third, what happened to Tornado/Razer/Firestorm?
 * Nick: maybe it's challenge belt run and damaging weapon give it the edge over firestorm or something
 * Nick: but that'd be a strange call in itself
 * Toast: Or did they reward it for doing well in the Challenge Belt, yeah
 * Nick: though the other big machines had good extreme 2's as well
 * Nick: so it's a bizarre call to make
 * Toast: But we did just have Heat A without Tornado, and the third seed is normally in Heat B, isn't it
 * Toast: meanwhile Killerkat's on fire or something
 * Nick: maybe tornado was disqualified for cheating or something
 * Toast: omg I think you might be right
 * Nick: goodbye, killerkat
 * Toast: then they just moved Pussycat into that heat, I guess?
 * Nick: they must have
 * Toast: I mean, not gonna lie, I'm OK if Tornado isn't in this series
 * Nick: same
 * Toast: If we were going to lose anyone out of Tornado, Razer and Firestorm, we certainly can't let it be Razer
 * Nick: and it seems like that'd be the likely outcome with no inclusion in Heat A
 * Nick: Like, there's no way they'd bung a champion in a random Heat
 * Toast: So who the hell wins this Heat now
 * Toast: oh god idk
 * Nick: Well here are the Feathweights at least
 * Nick: While we recover from the debacle of Terrorhurtz
 * Toast: Come on Flybot, you're the only one I remember
 * Toast: Well obviously I remember Argh!
 * Nick: OMG A MINI PUSSYCAT
 * Nick: IT'S BACK, LADS
 * Toast: that's actually awesome
 * Nick: what the hell are half of these machines
 * Toast: wasn't it the one that toppled Flybot into the pit in the first place though
 * Toast: Jesus Mr Psycho
 * Nick: OH GOD MR PSYCHO
 * Nick: HAHAHA THREE HOUSE ROBOTS
 * Toast: WHAT
 * Nick: Let's hope they stay away from the CPZs then
 * Toast: Green one is pretty strong
 * Nick: OH GOD THEY'RE GOING INTO THE ARENA
 * Nick: what is psycho doing so far out
 * Toast: they actually called one Cheese 2 hahaha
 * Nick: maybe roger plant made it
 * Toast: Yeah you're right about Psycho 😕
 * Nick: oh my god
 * Nick: rip was the best one as well
 * Nick: leave it alone, you bully
 * Toast: What's he doing??? Green flipper was winning!
 * Toast: Growler has one too!
 * Nick: growler has one as well what the hell
 * Nick: Well at least that box one was already immobile
 * Toast: this one's completely lost the sense of competition, I've lost track
 * Toast: Somehow Green Robot still works so I guess that wins, how many go through?
 * Nick: this is the shittest house robot rebellion ever
 * Nick: that's true - I'd guess a good 2/3 with it being a melee
 * Nick: HAHAHAHAHA WHAT HAPPENED THERE
 * Toast: PAHAHAHAHAHA
 * Nick: OMG
 * Toast: DID IT JUST DO THE DOUBLE
 * Toast: I thought I saw one go out of the arena!
 * Nick: well that was certainly worth the house robots being dicks!
 * Toast: that made up for everything
 * Nick: four were still mobile wtf
 * Nick: how
 * Toast: ah it's two go through - haven't a clue who wins other than Greenie
 * Toast: Did Kitty knock out a battery there
 * Nick: yeah it did
 * Nick: maybe that'll swing it
 * Nick: omg what
 * Toast: ...apparently not!
 * Nick: what even was prince of awe anyway
 * Toast: I don't recognise the team
 * Toast: apparently Rip lost its flipper halfway through and still dominated
 * Nick: so because two go through that'll mean we have more featherweight battles - great stuff
 * Nick: oh god now we go back to this strange round 2 lineup after the break
 * Toast: yeah as long as the House Robots are kept in order, I'm up for more, especially more floor flips
 * Toast: Did they just use the stat boards sound effect on Mr Psycho's hammer
 * Nick: haha, they actually did!
 * Nick: hmm this'll be interesting
 * Nick: gyrobot seemed solid in its melee
 * Nick: maybe it can get enough damage points on grim reaper
 * Nick: grim reaper's flipper seems solid but with no ko potential
 * Toast: Anyway I didn't really watch Gyrobot's first melee but if it's genuinely a 30kg+ spinner, it should beat The Grim Reaper
 * Toast: Yeah it turned Big Nipper over a few times but they weren't big flips, this should be Gyrobot
 * Nick: gyrobot is certainly the one robot in this heat I'd fancy to do well in the semis if they made it
 * Nick: let's see if its ring lives up to potential
 * Toast: There's only M2 for it to face and it should stay in the arena and beat that on damage
 * Toast: But Big Nipper will be hard in the Heat Final
 * Nick: big nipper seems solid but i doubt it can win drawn out fights because its claws don't seem to work in terms of causing damage
 * Nick: hmm, gyrobot is struggling a bit here
 * Toast: Yeah it's not winning yet, driver needs to spit his chuddy out
 * Nick: he's just not getting it up to speed properly
 * Toast: OK they were at top speed there and did no damage at all
 * Nick: oh dear
 * Nick: well is gyrobot a flop or grim reaper a durable machine
 * Toast: Are we really going to have The Grim Reaper and Big Nipper as a Heat Final
 * Nick: it depends if big nipper can withstand damage from jackson wallop
 * Nick: but if jackson wallop if anything like gyrobot then big nipper may get it
 * Nick: is anything
 * Toast: yeah I suppose I wasn't really focusing on Jackson's spinner
 * Toast: this fight's dragging on a bit
 * Nick: this actually went all the way
 * Nick: meh
 * Toast: I think we just saw all five minutes of it
 * Nick: grim reaper's fight but that was more gyrobot being underwhelming that grim reaper being amazing
 * Nick: than grim reaper
 * Toast: Yeah disappointing show from Gyrobot, I don't think I'll remember that one in a few weeks
 * Toast: I wonder how it won its qualifier to get in the series if it's that inoffensive
 * Nick: it seems like fully-body spinners are just a bad weapon to go for
 * Nick: after the likes of typhoon 2 in extreme 2 as well
 * Toast: that was harsh Craig, "billy no mates"
 * Toast: Typhoon 1 was good but can you trust the middleweights?
 * Nick: exactly
 * Toast: Corkscrew seems to be declining
 * Nick: at this heavier weight class it seems too much of a step up
 * Nick: wait they're actually the series 3 grim reaper
 * Toast: oh wow it totally is
 * Nick: that's surpising
 * Toast: it's only designed for seven fights so let's hope they don't go into the losers' melee
 * Nick: yeah, that's a good shout actually
 * Nick: wait what is going on here
 * Toast: ohhhhhhh no wayyyyy
 * Nick: surely that's not the case
 * Toast: they're extremely confident about it
 * Toast: but if they're right about being lower than the spinner...
 * Nick: well if big nipper is lower then it is going to be a repeat of the opening melee fight after all
 * Nick: with the grim reaper and big nipper clashing again
 * Nick: oh wow yeah it looks like it will be too low
 * Toast: and on the evidence of that, a Big Nipper heat win
 * Nick: yeah it's comfortably lower
 * Toast: let it be reminded that we're definitely getting another unseeded heat winner
 * Nick: well this is a mess
 * Nick: that's true
 * Nick: and neither of the two that could win the heat have any damage potential so i doubt they'd do well in the semis
 * Toast: what actually can Jackson Wallop do
 * Nick: big nipper's claws still don't move that much
 * Toast: Yeah I considered Gyrobot beating M2 but not these
 * Toast: Wait which one is related to Atilla the Drum??
 * Nick: wait really
 * Toast: I'm sure JP just said it
 * Toast: oh Jackson lost a wheel
 * Nick: I'd assume it'd just be him having a random moment. neither of these are anything like atilla
 * Nick: well that's jackson wallop done for
 * Nick: two rather bland second round fights, these
 * Nick: oh wow jackson wallop broke the arena wall
 * Toast: well I think it's been punished enough, count it out already
 * Nick: so there's obviously some power in it
 * Toast: yeah sadly agree, really weak second round fights
 * Nick: what a shame these two spinners are dropping out
 * Nick: one being underwhelming, one being done by the draw
 * Toast: not a great first round melee either, I suppose this hasn't been the best heat in general
 * Nick: oh god can the house robots just leave it now
 * Toast: featherweights was probably the highlight
 * Nick: oh thank goodness it's over
 * Nick: yeah, absolutely
 * Nick: and even that featured the house robots going wild at first
 * Toast: ugh it's over
 * Toast: so Big Nipper for a heat win then? I was maybe focusing on Kan-Opener too much but I think they were winning first time round
 * Nick: i'm not sure either way to be honest
 * Nick: they both seemed to be scrapping around without actually doing that much
 * Toast: Certainly Big Nipper would be a more original heat winner instead of a second flipper
 * Nick: that's true
 * Toast: Grim Reaper is clearly weaker than M2, no robots out of the arena today
 * Nick: though I think I'll back grim reaper. if it can flip a shape like gyrobot over consistently, it should do the same to big nipper
 * Nick: yeah it hasn't even come close
 * Toast: whoa JP says "everyone's talking about the Grim Reaper"
 * Toast: well I guess I'll shut up then thinking Big Nipper might have it
 * Nick: let's see how this goes then
 * Nick: maybe jp has foreshadowed this
 * Nick: ooh, solid drive by big nipper there
 * Toast: oh great attack, I'm right to start off with
 * Toast: Right this is the chance for an OotA
 * Nick: look at grim reaper labouring to try an oota
 * Toast: look at that defence
 * Toast: admittedly Big Nipper needs to get free, Grim Reaper might be on top, but still close
 * Nick: this is a good fight back by grim reaper after a sloppy start
 * Nick: yeah it seems on top
 * Nick: oh here's big nipper again though
 * Nick: this is mighty tight
 * Toast: SGT BASH DAMAGE?
 * Nick: oh god that makes a change
 * Nick: yeah big nipper's asserting itself again now
 * Nick: ooh, it will go to a judges
 * Toast: oh wow this is a close one
 * Nick: I'd give the edge to big nipper, to be honest, but it's very close
 * Toast: Jonathan thinks it's Big Nipper and he's probably right
 * Toast: But a good fight overall, made up for the rest of the heat
 * Toast: ??????
 * Nick: well then
 * Toast: there's booing for good reason!
 * Nick: I mean it was close so it's not a complete robbery but now it's two flippers winning heats
 * Nick: and two of the non all-star flippers too
 * Toast: Yeah I feel a bit dodgy about that, the heat was redeeming itself
 * Nick: I like unseeded winners but come on
 * Toast: oh god a third judges' decision!
 * Nick: haha, that says a lot
 * Nick: so who do we have next week
 * Toast: well we're gonna see The Grim Reaper again, I don't think it'll get those seven fights. Strange outcome IMO
 * Nick: KING B IS BACK
 * Toast: ah Dantomkia!
 * Nick: Now there's a seeded machine!
 * Nick: Okay that looks a solid heat
 * Nick: though a Dantomkia rope at the same time
 * Nick: I noticed no machines in that second melee
 * Toast: I love Dantomkia, really excited to see that again
 * Nick: though that leaves us with another flipper winning a heat if so
 * Nick: which is a little annoying
 * Toast: ah well, we'll cross that bridge next week, it might lose yet
 * Nick: if it does win i'll just blame the judges for this heat final we just saw anyway