- "From outer space, or from the Venuses of hell, come the weird, wacky, wild creations of the roboteers. It's manufactured mayhem! Heat H for hot, hurly burly, horrible hammering. But who will be cleaning up tonight on Robot Wars?"
- — Jonathan Pearce's introduction
Heat H of Robot Wars: The Seventh Wars was the eighth of sixteen heats which determined the Semi-Finalists of Robot Wars: The Seventh Wars. The episode featuring Heat H was originally broadcast on December 20, 2003 on Five.
- "Welcome to Robot Wars: The Seventh Wars. This is the result of sixty-five million years of evolution. At first, we hit each other with sticks. Then we hit each other with chunks of metal. But now, chunks of metal hit each other with everything they've got. And don't we just love it?! They [the audience] are a sophisticated lot."
- — Craig Charles' introduction
|Dimensions||0.68 x 0.91 x 0.76m|
|Power||2 x 1.2KW electric motors|
|Weapons||High pressure flipper|
|Weaknesses||High ground clearance|
|From: Loughborough, Leicestershire|
|Team Members: Francis Smith, John Hart & Anna Hart|
|Dimensions||0.55 x 1.10 x 0.82m|
|Power||1 x 3000W electric motor|
|Strengths||Fast & tough|
|Weaknesses||Limited CO2 supply|
|From: Capelle aan den IJssel, The Netherlands|
|Team Members: Marien van der Meer & Mario de Jongh|
|Dimensions||0.36 x 1.12 x 0.66m|
|Power||800W electric motors|
|Weaknesses||Made from scrap|
|From: Tipton, West Midlands|
|Team Members: Andrew Brown & Lee Shaw|
|Mega Hurts LT|
|Dimensions||0.62 x 1.02 x 0.69m|
|Power||2 x 750W electric motors|
|Weapons||2 x Full pressure flippers|
|From: Preston, Lancashire|
|Team Members: Dave Lund & Tony Lund|
|Dimensions||0.90 x 1.15 x 1.20m|
|Power||800W electric motor|
|Weapons||Crushing claw & flipper|
|Weaknesses||No known weaknesses|
|From: Ossett, West Yorkshire|
|Team Members: Colin Scott, Stephen Keating & Jordan Keating|
|Ming Dienasty (seeded 15th)|
|Dimensions||0.48 x 1.00 x 0.65m|
|Power||2 x 460W electric motors|
|From: West Cranmore, Somerset|
|Team Members: Andrew Cotterell, Oliver Cotterell & Elliot Cotterell|
|Dimensions||0.23 x 0.76 x 0.66m|
|Power||3 x 1.5KW electric motors|
|Weaknesses||Multiple combat failures|
|From: East Kilbride, Scotland|
|Team Members: Roger Webb & Gordon Anderson|
|Dimensions||0.37 x 1.07 x 0.83m|
|Power||2 x 800W electric motors|
|Weaknesses||Prone to flipper failure|
|From: St. Agnes, Cornwall|
|Team Members: Terry Carlin, Michael Gambon & Benjamin Carlin|
- "Oh it looks dangerous out there tonight, Craig. In our first four machine maul the seeds Ming Dienasty will be up against it from three newcomers to UK Robot Wars, each hoping to slice its way into history. Will Ming go in a flash? Then in our second battle, the FFF feel - full-on flip ability factor. So grind those gears, gnash those teeth and fight on!"
- — Jonathan Pearce
Ming Dienasty (15) vs Metalis vs Scraptosaur vs CerosEdit
Ceros was the first to launch an attack, getting underneath and flipping Ming Dienasty, who seemed unable to self-right. Ceros then flipped Metalis as Ming Dienasty finally managed to self-right. Scraptosaur got underneath and flipped Ming Dienasty before pushing it around the arena to prevent it from self-righting. Metalis was counted out as Ming Dienasty flailed around in an attempt to self-right, but Ceros came in and flipped it back onto its wheels.
- "And they've gone. Drained away through the Robot Wars sieve to oblivion."
- — Jonathan Pearce as Metalis is counted out
Metalis was righted by Ceros but was attacked by Growler as Ming Dienasty activated the pit release button. Ceros and Scraptosaur appeared to gang up on Ming Dienasty, but both seemed unable to flip it again and Ming Dienasty fought back with the drill.
- "Ahh, there's the drill of Ming Dienasty. Well they've put in a good late effort, drilling away."
- — Jonathan Pearce as Ming Dienasty attempts a late fightback
Metalis was nudged into the pit by Refbot and cease was called with the other three robots still mobile. After much deliberation, the judges went in favour of Scraptosaur and Ceros, meaning the fifteenth seed was eliminated from the competition.
- "And the judges have made their decision. They were looking at style, control, damage and aggression. It's a bit controversial. The fifteenth seed, Ming Dienasty, they go out. Scraptosaur and Ceros, they go through!"
- — Craig Charles announces the judges' decision after the commercial break
Qualified: Scraptosaur & Ceros
Revolution 3 vs St. Agro vs The Scrapper vs Mega Hurts LTEdit
Mega Hurts LT and St. Agro immediately engaged, but got their flippers caught up with each other and did nothing. St. Agro had another attempt and threw Mega Hurts LT into the air, but it landed on its wheels. As Revolution 3 and The Scrapper did battle, St. Agro flipped Mega Hurts LT over near the arena wall. Mega Hurts LT self-righted, but was pushed around by Revolution 3 and appeared to stop moving.
- "Mega Hurts, to be honest, looks in a bit of trouble."
- — Jonathan Pearce
St. Agro then attacked The Scrapper, but failed to flip it over completely. Mega Hurts LT started to move again just as St. Agro got underneath The Scrapper, pushed it towards the wall and threw it out of the arena.
- "I like the look of St. Agro with the double flipper as well. The trouble is with flippers, as I'm sure you know now, all you roboteers out there, if they are powered by a CO2 bottle, the supply is limited, so, is, the life, of, The Scrapper! Gone!"
- — Jonathan Pearce as The Scrapper is flipped out of the arena by St. Agro
Meanwhile, Mega Hurts LT had stopped moving once again and was nudged by Revolution 3, before St. Agro attempted to flip it out of the arena, but failed. Mega Hurts LT was thrown across the arena by Growler, before being flipped over once again by St. Agro. After this attack, St. Agro's flippers appeared to be jammed open and Revolution 3 appeared to have stopped moving, but Mega Hurts LT was counted out and both robots were through to the next round. Mega Hurts LT was then thrown by the arena flipper and pitted by Growler before cease was called.
- "...but it all got locked up. The memory was lost. And as for a byte, there's a mega bite...from Growler. Back to the old laptop case."
- — Jonathan Pearce as Mega Hurts LT is pitted
Qualified: Revolution 3 & St. Agro
- "This is how they line up. In a moment, Ceros against Revolution 3 but first up, Scraptosaur and St. Agro. And Jayne's in the pits with them."
- — Jonathan Pearce recapping how the second round lines up
St. Agro vs ScraptosaurEdit
Scraptosaur attempted to flip St. Agro, and successfully threw it into the air on the second attempt. Scraptosaur continued to get underneath and flip St. Agro. However, because it was invertible, St. Agro was able to keep going. Eventually, Scraptosaur activated the pit release button and continued to flip St. Agro over and over again.
- "Is that an early worry from Scraptosaur that their CO2 supply is diminishing, therefore they have to get it over and done with now?"
- — Jonathan Pearce as Scraptosaur rushes towards the pit release button
St. Agro attempted to get underneath Scraptosaur, failing on many attempts but finally getting underneath as Scraptosaur began to run out of CO2. Scraptosaur tried to self-right but its CO2 supply had been depleted and it was attacked in the CPZ by Sir Killalot and then Cassius Chrome. Finally, Scraptosaur was counted out and had an ocean buoy dropped on it before being pitted.
Winner: St. Agro
Revolution 3 vs CerosEdit
- "St. Agro through to the Heat H Final. They'll meet Ceros or Revolution 3. Jayne's in the pits with the Revolution boys."
- — Jonathan Pearce
Revolution 3 immediately ran away from Ceros and activated the pit release button, but Ceros caught up with it and tried unsuccessfully to flip it.
- "I hope this isn't over quickly, because I was looking forward to a long and punishing battle here."
- — Jonathan Pearce, just before Revolution 3 grinds to a halt
The robots ran into each other again and Revolution 3 appeared to stop moving. This left Ceros free to flip it over at will before Shunt came in to attack Revolution 3 with its axe. Ceros then attempted to flip Shunt and the house robot backed away, leaving Sgt. Bash to attack Revolution 3. Ceros then attacked Sgt. Bash and ran away as Shunt retaliated, attacking Ceros with its axe.
- "Built like a rhinoceros, strong as a rhino, quick as a leopard, out there at the moment."
- — Jonathan Pearce as Ceros attacks the House Robots
Revolution 3 was finally counted out as Ceros flipped Shunt over onto its side. Shunt was righted by Refbot and joined Sgt. Bash in an attempt to pit Ceros, but Ceros resisted and Sgt. Bash hung it over the edge of the pit.
- "The Sergeant, I mean, brute strength, but to be honest ladies and gentleman, the Sergeant doesn't have a lot up top. The flamethrower is flickering, but there's no one at home. Take away one of his stripes, get him down to a corporal, a private."
- — Jonathan Pearce as Sgt. Bash fails to pit Ceros
Meanwhile, Revolution 3 had a television dropped on it and cease was finally called.
- "This for a place in the series semi-finals. St. Agro or Ceros will make it through."
- — Jonathan Pearce
St. Agro vs CerosEdit
The battle started slowly as both robots tried to find a way to get underneath each other. Ceros got into position and tried to flip St. Agro, but turned itself over in the process and appeared to stop moving. Refbot came in and nudged Ceros onto its back, allowing it to self-right. Ceros managed to flip St. Agro twice more, but the invertible machine kept on going and flipped Ceros over, but it was able to self-right again.
- "This is tremendous stuff - great control by the drivers to be able to self-right like that, under pressure."
- — Jonathan Pearce
St. Agro then activated the pit release button and attempted to throw Ceros into the pit, but Ceros was just able to escape from oblivion. However, Ceros appeared to have mobility problems and was unable to move away from the edge of the pit.
- "Ceros, OH, on the brink of oblivion, and disaster - on the brink of the pit."
- — Jonathan Pearce as the action heats up near the pit
St. Agro tried to nudge Ceros into the pit, but drove onto Ceros's flipper and the process and was very nearly thrown into the pit itself by Ceros. Matilda then came in and broke one of St. Agro's wheels with its flywheel, but St. Agro was still able to flip Ceros up onto its back against the arena wall. Ceros was attacked by Matilda and sat there stranded, seemingly unable to self-right, before finally being counted out by Refbot. Matilda ended the battle by sending Ceros flying out of the arena with her flywheel. Afterwards, Ceros' flipper was seen slightly functioning again.
- "And in the end, Francis Smith ran out of power, and Ceros ran out of room and hope. Good old Matilda. You can count on her rear end in any sort of catastrophe."
- — Jonathan Pearce as Ceros gets thrown out of the arena by Matilda's flywheel
Heat Winner: St. Agro
- "Get down to your garages, and your electrical stores, and build yourself a robot, for Robot Wars!"
- — Craig Charles' sign-off
- Main article: Robot Wars: The Seventh Wars/Crusher Crunch Up
Between Round 1 and Round 2 of each heat (except Heat I), a 'Special Event' was shown. For Heat H, it was the 'Crusher Crunch Up', in which three robots with crushing weapons competed in a single battle in the arena.
Crusher Crunch Up Champion: Mantis
- Heat H was the only heat from the Seventh Wars in which the seeded robot competed in the first round and was eliminated at the first hurdle.
- Ming Dienasty became the second and last seed in history to fall in Round 1 via a judges' decision.
- This was the only heat of the series that did not feature a Heat Finalist from a previous series in the line-up.
- This was the first heat not to feature a previous heat finalist since the final heat of Series 3 and the last heat not to feature a heat finalist from a previous series in the line-up.
- This was the fourth and final time that Team Death lost before the Heat Semi-Final.
- Just like Heat H of The Third Wars, a robot from Team Death and a robot from the Mega Hurts team (who entered Tut's Revenge in The Third Wars) appeared in the same heat and both teams lost in the first round.
- This was the last heat where a seeded robot was eliminated in the first round of the UK Championship.
- This was one of only two episodes of Series 7 to feature all nine House Robots, the other being The Third World Championship.
- This was the last appearance of Team Death, Team Mega Hurts and Ming, although the latter's team later appeared in Heat P with Zorro.
- At the start of the heat, Jonathan Pearce claimed Ming Dienasty was fighting "three newcomers to UK Robot Wars" - while Ceros was a newcomer, and Scraptosaur was new to the UK series, Metalis came from an experienced team that fought in three previous UK championships. He made a correction later saying Metalis was a new machine for an experienced team.
- When Scraptosaur entered the arena for its first battle in the heat, Jonathan Pearce claimed it had once reached a Semi-Final in Dutch Robot Wars. Scraptosaur actually reached the Grand Final in Dutch Series 2, as there were no Semi-Finals in the format for the Dutch series.
- Jonathan Pearce kept pronouncing Ceros as "Seer-ros" during the first melee, but later pronounced it correctly from Round 2 onwards.
- In the House Robot introductions prior to the first melee, Growler was shown in the arena outside a CPZ before the camera then cut to him sitting inside the bottom-left CPZ when the battle was getting underway.
- Revolution 3's statistics board referred to its spinning drum as a rotating flywheel. Jonathan Pearce made this same mistake as well.
- An editing error happened in the second melee which showed both Dead Metal and Growler in the same CPZ.
- In the first melee, Growler's jaws appeared to be having problems and only closing after letting go of Metalis.
- This was the only heat of Series 7 not to have the two heat finalists get interviewed before the final and the last heat of the original run not to have the two heat finalists interviewed before the final.