Stefan Frank/Quotes

This page is a partial list of quotes spoken by commentator Stefan Frank throughout the US series Robot Wars: Extreme Warriors, Robot Wars: Grand Champions and Nickelodeon Robot Wars.

Extreme Warriors: Season 1

"Green House in the Corner Patrol Zone, Tut Tut with the axe in the top. Uh-oh, UH-OH! Tut Tut puts Green House in its own tomb, and makes his mummy proud!"

— The Green House vs Tut Tut, Robot Rebellion, Eliminator, as Tut Tut axes and pits The Green House

"Oh no, it's time for a bit of Southern fried mouse - extra crispy!"

— TriceraBot vs The Green Mouse, Robot Rebellion, Eliminator, as TriceraBot rams an overturned Green Mouse onto the Flame Pit

"...and Sir Killalot looks bent on revenge! First victim: Silver Box, gettin' chucked around like a piece of trash! Sir Killalot's not having any of it. TriceraBot trying to do somethin' to the back of Sir Killalot, but forget it! He's not goin' anywhere! TriceraBot, they're all gonna try and move in now, for the sacrif- OH NO! Killalot goes up on his face! TriceraBot takes advantage of the little bit of weight distribution. They're goin' nuts up in the booth! Meanwhile, Silver Box takes a slam dunk! And TriceraBot's trying his best to get Sir Killalot, but it ain't gonna happen! Sir Killalot trying to back out of this one... and I tell you, is that amazing? Four on one, and they still couldn't take him down!"

— Silver Box, Tut Tut, TriceraBot & Rosie the Riveter vs Matilda & Shunt (& Sir Killalot), Robot Rebellion, Rebellion, as Sir Killalot attacks Silver Box, topples and is almost edged into the pit by the remaining competitors

"Drillzilla... circling around. Uh-oh... well, every party needs some clown to do the barbeque. "I'm melting! Nooooooooo! Ooooooh deeeaaar!" Aw, come on, somebody come put the Clown out! It's a family show!"

— Drillzilla vs Rippa Raptor vs Red Virus vs Conquering Clown, Annihilator, Round 3, as Conquering Clown's head burns off after Drillzilla pushes it onto the Flame Pit

"Look at that, almost two full rotations off of there! Run Away definitely can be renamed to 'Fly Away' at this point!"

— General Chompsalot & Run Away vs Falcon & Joker, Tag Team Terror, Round 1, as Run Away is thrown by the Floor Flipper

"Well I tell ya, TriceraBot is doing everything. He's crashin', he's bashin', he's just set the pit open. This boy's on fire... literally!"

— TriceraBot & Rosie the Riveter vs Falcon & Joker, Tag Team Terror, Playoff, as a smouldering TriceraBot activates the Pit and proceeds to push Falcon in

"Well, those lawnmower rotor blades don't seem to be doing too much damage on Drillzilla. Drillzilla's got all the power and all the cookies!"

— Drillzilla & Tut Tut vs General Chompsalot & Run Away, Tag Team Terror, Final, as Run Away is pressured by Drillzilla

"First there was Tom and Jerry, then Itchy and Scratchy. Could this be another epic cat-and-mouse confrontation? We'll see..."

— Pussycat vs 6 Million Dollar Mouse, War of Independence, Eliminator, calling the start of the fight

"And there's the bridgework of General Chompsalot - maybe Mick can get a dentist number from them?"

— Joker vs General Chompsalot, War of Independence, Semi-Final, as General Chompsalot takes its starting position

"Aw, Chompsalot's not looking too good. Looks like he's been demoted from General down to Buck Private! Used to be 'buck teeth', but no more teeth in this case."

— General Chompsalot vs Pussycat, War of Independence, Final, commenting on the damage inflicted to General Chompsalot as it tussles with Pussycat

"And there's Coffin-Bot, looking like a coffee table."

— TriceraBot vs The Revolutionist vs Coffin-Bot vs Bot-Ugly vs Unibite vs Sobek, US Championship, Heat 2, briefly introducing Coffin-Bot

"It's a good thing it's a coffin already, because we're getting ready for a real burial."

— TriceraBot vs The Revolutionist vs Coffin-Bot vs Bot-Ugly vs Unibite vs Sobek, US Championship, Heat 2, as Coffin-Bot is attacked by Sergeant Bash

"Oh, it's the Mad Cow! The Mad Cow's a dead cow, and Shunt's gonna have a little fun with him now!"

— Tiger Cat vs Close Enough vs Rippa Raptor vs Manta vs Rosie the Riveter vs Mad Cow, US Championship, Heat 3, as a recently-eliminated Mad Cow is pushed across the arena by Shunt

"Cyclone with that big wheel, looks like the wheel of misfortune right now!"

— General Chompsalot vs Run Away vs Spartacus vs Cyclone vs Panzer Mk2 vs Drillzilla, US Championship, Heat 4, noticing Cyclone's immobility

"...and Chaos 2 knows it's time for a bit of 'flipaggio'... that's Italian for 'flipping', I think. Chaos 2, the UK reigning champ, is about ready to put Mastiff down in the hole - OH! Who would have ever believed Chaos 2 dropped themsel[ves] in the hole? Mastiff, admittedly with a little Italian side-step, put Chaos 2 down in the pit!"

— Chaos 2 (UK) vs Manta (USA) vs Mastiff (ITA) vs Ansgar (GER),World Championship, Chaos 2 (UK) vs Manta (USA) vs Mastiff (ITA) vs Ansgar (GER)|Heat 1, as Chaos 2 accidentally pits itself while attacking Mastiff

"...and Firestorm 3 flips over NEAT Machine from Holland, and Drillzilla comes in for the clean-up! Look at that, Tag Team at its best!"

— Whirlpool 70 (SWE) vs Drillzilla (USA) vs NEAT Machine (NED) vs Firestorm 3 (UK), World Championship, Heat 2, as Firestorm 3 and Drillzilla jointly eliminate NEAT Machine

Extreme Warriors: Season 2

"Probophobia knows how to work it... as they put those skewers right into Snake Bite, for a little snake kebab!"

— Probophobia vs Snake Bite, US Championship, Heat A, Round 2, as Probophobia simultaneously lifts and spears Snake Bite by the wheel well

"Brute's got the power of pushin', the grinders are goin'. Now Unibite had better come up with something real quick, or else they're gonna be bot butter!"

— Brute vs Unibite 2.0, US Championship, Heat C, Round 2, as a dominant Brute pushes Unibite 2.0 around the arena

"Look at that, pulled the whole thing out of it, shafts and all, chain drive - it's over! They're not goin' to be mowin' any more lawns this week!"

— Propeller-Head vs The Revolutionist, US Championship, Heat D, Final, shortly after The Revolutionist rips Propeller-Head’s spinning blade off

"Look at that! That's a solid steel wheel - Destructive Criticism's disk just went in there and mashed it up, like it's a piece of white bread! Unbelievable, and Run Away is not running anywhere today!"

— Destructive Criticism vs Lightning Tracks vs Run Away, US Championship, Heat G, Round 1, as Destructive Criticism severely damages Run Away's right-rear wheel and axle

"They're both parallel parked right next to each other and nobody's moving! It's incredible! Talk about your 'one-hit wonders'...."

— Destructive Criticism vs General Chompsalot 2, US Championship, Heat G, Final, as both competitors are left immobilised together

"Its not only a Tag Team, but it's a bad driving ceremony!"

— Trackzilla & Trilobyte vs Mad Cow Bot & Texas Tornado, Tag Team Terror, Round 1 as Trilobyte drives itself into the pit under no pressure

"Well, did the bot get your tongue?"

— General Chompsalot 2 vs Brawler, International Championship, Round 1, after Brawler rips General Chompsalot 2's decorative tongue out

"So Snookums got a little organ donation… and it didn’t do him any good whatsoever!"

— Snake Bite & Snookums vs Dead Metal & Shunt (& Sir Killalot), Robot Rebellion, Rebellion, as an immobile Snookums has an organ dropped on it by the Drop Zone

Robot Wars: Grand Champions

"Why, I tell ya, Chaos 2 has just done what his name said! He's gone in there and created chaos, wherever he's gone. Look at that, up and over! Goodbye! Can anybody stop the awesome power of Chaos 2?"

— Chaos 2 vs Atomic vs Indefatigable, Heat A, Eliminator, as Chaos 2 throws Indefatigable out of the arena

"Razer, what an awesome, awesome design... with an unbelievable power. Just look at that thing go through! It's just cuttin' through like Jello!"

— Razer vs Robochicken vs Velocirippa, Heat B, Eliminator, impressed with Razer's design and crushing beak as its attacks Velocirippa

"...it doesn't look good for the chicken right now as Razer, bears down with that 9-ton pincer! OH, doing some major damage on the chicken! Well, I guess it's up to Razer to set the pecking order!"

— Razer vs Robochicken vs Velocirippa, Heat B, Eliminator, as Razer pierces the top-front armor of Robochicken

"Milly-Ann Bug... another comedy entrant, in at 175lbs. It's got four motors... and some spikes that look like TV antennas! I don't think they'll be doing much damage."

— Pussycat vs Milly-Ann Bug vs Reptirron, Heat B, Eliminator, overview of Milly-Ann Bug's statistics

"...only two can make it through, into the next round. And one is definitely gonna go down, and aptly named The Morgue, as he gets laid upon the old cremation slab!"

— Firestorm 2 vs The Morgue vs Scar, Heat C, Eliminator, as Sir Killalot places an inverted Morgue over the Flame Pit

"Mortis is now on Iron-Awe; could be the battle of the axes, and we're not talking about air guitar..."

— Mortis vs Iron-Awe vs Mazakari, Heat D, Eliminator, commenting on Mortis' first attacks on Iron-Awe

"Well, if 101 had any ventilation problems, he doesn't now, because Dominator... [is] making him a colander!"

— 101 vs Dominator 2, Heat E, Final (Round 3), shortly after Dominator 2 axes 101

"Look at that! Almost dropped Dreadnaut out of the arena... on his headnaut!"

— Dreadnaut XP1 vs Thermidor 2, Heat G, Semi-Final (Round 2), over replays of Thermidor 2 flipping Dreadnaut XP1 over

"Wow! This is gonna have to go to the Judges, 'cos you never know what's going on, but it's a pit party, that's for sure!"

— Wheely Big Cheese vs Prizephita Mk2 vs Wheelosaurus, Heat H, Eliminator, as all three competitors end up being pitted by the House Robots

"And there it is on a Judges' decision - Killerhurtz and Eric, burst any future dreams of Destruct-A-Bubble! More up, after the break!"

— Killerhurtz vs Destruct-A-Bubble vs Eric, Heat I, Eliminator, as Destruct-A-Bubble is eliminated

"Plunderbird 4 right to the side of Knightmare - Knightmare backs up... and wedges Plunderbird 4 from the side! Wow, what a great shove that was, just when they weren't looking for it! Well, The Plunderbird Boys better lose their sunglasses because they would've missed that one!"

— Plunderbird 4 vs Knightmare, Heat L, Semi-Final (Round 2), as Knightmare tips Plunderbird 4 onto its side

"Nutley? Well, Scorpion looks more like a lower intestine to me..."

— Reactor 2 vs Sir Chromalot vs Scorpion, Heat M, Eliminator, commenting unfavorably on Scorpion's design during its introduction

"Arnold, Arnold Terminegger... they like it so much, they named it twice!"

— Behemoth vs Arnold, Arnold Terminegger vs Rambot, Heat N, Eliminator, introducing Team EyeEye's machine

"Could Oblivion 2 be out before it had even started? Let me remind ya, if anybody's immobilized for thirty seconds, they are history! And the House Bots can come in and kick sand in the face, of that poor, unfortunate, immobile bot!"

— Oblivion 2 vs Saw Point vs Aggrobot 2, Heat O, Eliminator, as an immobile Oblivion 2 is subjected to attacks from opponents and House Robots alike

"Hypno-Disc, with shaft-driven wheels on him. He's got an aluminum shell... and if he doesn't do any damage, at least he might hypnotize you into losing!"

— Hypno-Disc vs Raizer Blade vs The Predator, Heat P, Eliminator, underestimating the destructive capabilities of Hypno-Disc during its introduction

"Thermidor and Pussycat are really going on it! Thermidor just gets under Pussycat, and knocks him up into the stratosphere! Well, Pussycat better come up with some strategy, or some offensive movement, because Thermidor is just having everything go its way, right now..."

— Thermidor 2 vs Pussycat, Semi-Final 1, Round 1, commenting on Thermidor 2's early flips on Pussycat

"Oh, Chaos! What great driving by George Francis! There's a good reason why these guys are such dominators, in Robot Wars: Grand Champions! Just look at Chaos 2, and that CO₂ flipper, givin' proper airtime to the Tornado boys! Wow, up and outta there!"

— Chaos 2 vs Tornado, Semi-Final 1, Round 2, shortly after Chaos 2 throws Tornado out of the arena

"Well, it's all over for the X-Terminator crew. They have definitely been... exterminated!"

— Wild Thing vs X-Terminator (X-Terminator 2), Semi-Final 2, Round 1, as an inverted X-Terminator is attacked by the House Robots

Nickelodeon Robot Wars

"Wow, there's a strike!"

— DiskoTek vs Rigby vs The Revolutionist, Episode 5, Mayhem, as Rigby axes DiskoTek while both competitors have an assortment of balls dropped onto them

"And look at Vert-I-Go, completely dismantled! And Propeller-Head just wants a little bit more, taking off that plexiglass like its butter!"

— Propeller-Head vs Vert-I-Go vs The Revolutionist, Episode 5, Ultimate Mayhem, as Propeller-Head deals significant damage to Vert-I-Go